PROCRASTINATINGWe've all been guilty of this action. However, I came to a huge realization about it recently. Procrastinating is all about avoiding your greatness.
Remember what Marianne Williamson said, "It's our light not our darkness that most frightens us". I have been guilty of just that: being afraid of my greatness.
The one thing that stopped all the insanity was to keep moving. In fact, I just started doing things; taking inspired action; step by step. Hours would pass. I was in "the zone". I am currently working like crazy on a best-seller campaign for October 16th (more on that later) and the results have been astounding. I have really learned how to let go. Instead of putting this date off (yet again), I have decided to do it whether I am "ready" or not.
Robert Allen once said to me "You know you know enough when you realize that you don't know anything and you do it anyway". I love that!! I have finally realized that I don't know anything and I'm doing it ANYWAY!
LET GOA client once asked me "how do I let go"? It seems like it could be a very long-winded and complicated answer but it's really not. The answer to the question is very simple:
"Just let go"
Think of it this way. If someone asked you how to let go of a balloon on a string, you would say "just let go of your hand". It really is that simple. Opening your hand essentially "lets the balloon go". The key is in the "opening". You must open in order to let go.
If you are trying to let go of something big then you must open big. In most cases, the thing you must open is your heart. Healing occurs when we become open.
I learned this lesson this past month. It has been a stressful month and I have spent many hours trying to control everything. It makes for a very hectic day. Finally, I just surrendered and gave up my need to handle and direct everything. Two things happened: the first was that I finally relaxed and enjoyed my day (even the chaos); the second thing that happened when I detached from my expectations is that things started falling into place almost effortlessly. They were EASE-y (easy). I wrote about EASE last year but I guess that forgot how it worked. Thankfully, I remembered without a cosmic 2x4.
DO SOMETHING SCARYEveryday. I believe Eleanor Roosevelt said that. It's a great motto. I consciously chose to follow it the other day. We were at Family Camp in Algonquin Park. They have a high ropes course. I signed up for it.
For those of you who don't know me, I am terribly afraid of heights. In fact, a famed
bungee jump in New Zealand in 2001 can be viewed right off my website. This high ropes course was no pushover. Over 40 feet in the air.
When I arrived, there was no one there except the instructors and my husband Andrew. The instructor said "Oh good, there are no kids yet, you can do the rickety bridge". It looks exactly as it sounds. A bridge suspended high in the air at 40 feet above the ground - it was basically two cables with the odd piece of broken wood attached to it. It looked like it came straight out of a mining hillbilly movie.
I gear up and begin the 40 foot climb. When I get up there I am tethered to the safety rope that is being belayed by a woman who could not weigh more than 120lbs. Suffice to say that I weigh substantially more than that. How the hell could she hold me up? I would soon find out.
I began walking this stupid bridge and the fear flooded me like a poison. So much so that it completely halted me at exactly half way. I was stuck, shaking and scared to death. I muttered the horrid words "I can't". At this point both instructors joined in to help me. The girl on the ground showed me that I could trust her. The guy on the other side kept telling me to look at him and not the ground and do it one step at a time. I realized that "can't" was not an option because going back would be even harder than going forward. So, I took a DEEP breath and focused on the guy. I reminded myself that I WAS SAFE even though I appeared NOT SAFE. The scene was deceiving. I was very safe. I made it to the other side but I wasn't finished yet. I still had to get down on the ZIP line. I found this even scarier than the stupid bridge. I had to JUMP off a platform and glide down to the ground. You would not believe how scary it is to JUMP off a platform even though you KNOW you are connected to the wire. After a few countdowns and some MORE support I finally took the plunge. I think I uttered a
meek "mommy" when I jumped. I guess you never really outgrow that.
What I learned after the experience was this:
- When you are scared you need to pause, breathe and remind yourself that you are safe - this is called "TAKING CARE OF YOU"
- When you are scared it is important to let the people around you HELP YOU, especially if they offer it. But, if they don't, then you need to ask for help. This is called "LETTING GO OF CONTROL".
It works, I swear. I have experienced a huge energy jump since that day. Facing fear is a freeing experience. And yes, I am STILL afraid of heights.
CHANGEI have recently moved houses (which also explains my blogging absence). "They" say that it is high on the stress list - right up there with death and divorce. I have moved before but it seems that I have blocked out the stress involved. It reared its ugly head this week. I was not prepared for it until it knocked me over. I remember thinking "
somethings gotta give". Well, that "something" was my expectation and
pre-arranged notion of how things were supposed to go. That "something" was my need to control everything. I had to give it up. When I did, I finally felt good about all this chaos.
Does it really matter if the boxes get unpacked right away as long as the kids can find their clothes and we can eat our food? Does it really matter if we have to rearrange the furniture a few times before we get it right?
Ask yourself "what really matters here" and "what is the worst possible thing that can happen". You'll be surprised at how easy it is to choose the easy way. The peaceful way.
